It can be very helpful to keep a journal or notebook for treatment options and doctor notes. Plan to attend doctor’s appointments with your spouse/partner. With two people present, it makes it easier for one to ask the questions and the other to take notes. The journals can help alleviate stress and anxiety. They can also serve as a reference when other doctors ask for information on his medical history.

You might also want to keep a personal journal, where you record your thoughts and feelings. It is a wonderful way to track how you are coping with this crisis, and can help you initiate conversations with your spouse/partner. It’s also a good way to work out what you want to say, but haven’t yet verbalized. Writing down what you are feeling may be easier for you than having to say it right away. It’s not as scary because you are just writing. It’s private. You can determine if, when and how you want to share what you have written with your spouse/partner.

Both you and your spouse/partner can benefit from some of the excellent books available that deal with cancers. For an extensive list click on booklist.